In celebration of Father’s Day this month, I present the following. While I “don’t get it” apparently women do.
SUMMER CLASSES FOR MEN AT THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER
Note: Due to the complexity and difficulty level of these sessions, the class size will be limited.
CLASS 1: How to Fill Up the Ice Cube Tray – Step By Step, with Slide Presentation.
CLASS 2: The Toilet Paper Roll – Does it Change Itself? – Round Table Discussion.
CLASS 3: Is it Possible to Urinate Using the Technique of Lifting the Seat AND Avoiding the Floor? – Group Practice.
CLASS 4: Fundamental Differences between the Laundry Hamper AND the Floor – Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
CLASS 5: Dinner Dishes – Can they Levitate AND Fly into the Kitchen Sink? – Examples on Video.
CLASS 6: Loss of Identity – Losing the Remote Control to Your Significant Other – Help Line Support and Support Groups.
CLASS 7: Learning How to Find Things – Starting with Looking in the Right Places AND Not Turning the House Upside Down While Screaming. – Open Forum.
CLASS 8: Health Watch – Bringing her Flowers is Not Harmful to Your Health – Graphics and Audio tapes.
CLASS 9: Real Men Ask for Directions When Lost – Real Life Testimonials.
CLASS 10: Is it Genetically Impossible to Sit Quietly While She Drives? – Driving Simulations
CLASS 11: Learning to Live – Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife – Online classes and role-playing.
CLASS 12: How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion – Relaxation Exercises, Mediation & Breathing Techniques.
CLASS 13: The Stove/Oven – What it is AND How to Use it – Live Demonstration
CLASS 14: How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy – Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates AND Calling When You’re Going to be Late – Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors!
***A Sun City resident gets up from his chair. His wife says, “Where are you going?”
He replies, “I’m going to the doctor.” She asked, “Are you sick?”
“No” he said, “I’m going to get some of those blue pills for our sex life.” So his wife says, “I’m going to the doctor too.”
He asked “Why?” She replied, “If you’re going to start using that rusty old thing, I’m going to get a tetanus shot.”
