1. I have everything that I wanted as a teenager, but it’s 50 years later. I don’t have to depend on anyone to get it for me.
2. I don’t have to go to school or work anymore.
3. I get a bigger allowance every month.
4. I have my own place.
5. I don’t have to shave my legs, face, or any other body part anymore.
6. I don’t have a curfew except for the one my body now demands.
7. I have a driver’s license and my own car.
8. The biggest lie I tell myself now is – “I don’t have to write that down. I’ll remember it.”
9. I don’t have gray hair. I have “wisdom highlights.” (In Alaska, they call it ‘Arctic Blond’).
10. Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven’t met yet and nobody cares!
11. Of course, I talk to myself. Sometimes, I need advice.
12. To forget and get confused is “normal.”
13. Talking to myself is considered excentric.
14. Wearing clothes that don’t match is “cute.”
15. People give up their seat for you – whether you want it or not.
16. People speak louder to you even though you couldn’t care less about what they are saying.
17. You get help crossing the street even though that was not the way you wanted to go.
18. You can have dessert for breakfast!
19. You can stay up as late as you want.
20. You talk on the phone to people from India far more than you did before you turned 65.
21. New technology is like swimming through mud. However, once Tech representatives realize you are a Senior Citizen, they will do the technical work for you.
So, enjoy your senior years. If you’re having trouble, get a cat. They will make great companions and expect nothing from you.
