It appears there are more people demonstrating their obsession for senior abuse and controlling behavior these days.
I often refer to this attitude as you are old and have lived long enough, now it should be over syndrome. I write this because I am hearing more often about so-called friends and family members who shut “their senior” in a group home or assisted living – not caring about the desires of that senior person.
I have been corresponding with a Sun City resident who has become very concerned about the welfare of one of her good friends. She claims that her friend “Mary” is unfortunately involved in an abusive situation. And it is ongoing.
It appears that the person named in the Power of Attorney (POA) for Mary had taken complete control of Mary after she was released from a skilled nursing facility. This includes her finances and property ownership.
The designated “attorney-in-fact” unilaterally chose a group home for Mary’s new residence. She also advised the group home’s staff that Mary has been diagnosed with “dementia” and could not care for herself notwithstanding that there was no medical verification of this.
The attorney-in-fact has isolated Mary by limiting the visitors she is allowed to see and be with. No phone calls are allowed and continued requests by Mary to have a phone are denied.
Prior to my contact’s visitation being cut off, she was able to obtain a list of the medications that Mary is being given. It clearly documents that Mary is being heavily medicated.
After contacting Adult Protective Services, the agency quoted HIPPA laws as a reason to ignore the entire situation. And to add insult to injury, an associate of the attorney-in-fact filed a mechanic’s lien on Mary’s property.
I will be throwing myself into this situation and hope that this will result in “freedom” for “Mary.” She should be allowed to continue to live in her own home and spend her life as she always has.
An aid/caregiver can always be hired to assist a senior with any particular need as they need. Locking them away and taking control of their lives is demeaning and it is not the answer.
How do I know this? I too had parents who needed help as they aged. Neither of them had to give up their active social life. They just needed an aid, be it family, friend or employee to assist them with chores they could no longer do.
